Brainhavefun

A curious case of evolving from within

I find myself saying many positive things about my recent change in employment. My former colleagues say – wow, can this company be so wonderful? But I heard completely opposite things – people are hard to work with,  workload is not commensurable with rewards , and so on.

That made me think. Over the course of four years Iâ€ve been practicing harmony meditation and changing myself inside out. The gradual change was not so much noticeable from day to day, month to month, but as I reflected on my journey, it became clear how different I am now.

Without further adieu, here is the list of areas in which I observed major shifts.

As I learned to accept my shortcomings in daily communications, I learned to be more tolerant to views and ideas different from mine. I stopped taking it so personally and became much more aware of the “wall building” process. Letâ€s face it, there are people we like and people we donâ€t like as much. As part of a team building exercise I recently took the Briggs-Myers personality test and I came out as a 90% introvert. So I know a lot about wall building and secluding myself to a safe comfortable place. Collaboration is not something that came naturally to me.

Wall building begins when we experience a negative emotion towards a person and we stop listening even though we hear everything that person says. As soon as I lay the first brick, the Bigger Self tells me – what are you doing? Put it down! I obey once, twice, many times, and everyday feels like a new day, every “old new” encounter is full of promise and opportunities for making it better. A new work environment is a perfect place to practice “open space” application within and around me.

As I stopped wasting resources on emotions such as worrying, fear, feelings of inadequacy, I had more energy to invest in innovative problem solving. That energy did not just increase in quantity, but became purer and brighter, full of hopeful and empowering ideas. Sometimes I catch myself thinking – can I really do that? Am I smart enough to figure it out? Do I really have to tackle this big challenge? I pause and I breathe, and I watch the claws of the “smaller self” loosing its grip over me. Yes, I can if I decide to. Yes, I can choose to go forward into the unknown.

To me, one of the most rewarding experiences after years of practice and efforts was the ability to feel deep joy and happiness irrespective of external circumstances. That includes being joyful at work, as well as being happy on my own. Growing the power of savoring my true essence enables me with wiser choices at work, which does not go unnoticed by the management. Letâ€s see how much fun I have in the next six months or so. I promise to update you then.